Stop being a pussy and take the control of your life

“Stop being a pussy and take the control of your life” is what I want to say each time I heard negative people talking about their life. OK, it may be sound rude, but I try not to be negative in my life and these people, don’t help me. By experience, if you want to take the control of your life, you can do it.

You are not happy with your job, change for a new one. There are plenty of companies that are looking for their next employee. Of course, it’s a chance to get, maybe the job will be worst, but maybe it will be the best one you ever had.

You are not happy with your boyfriend, spouse or common-law, quit him/her. Yes, it’s not easy. Yes you will hurt the other one, but it’s your life. You don’t have to be mad the rest of it because you don’t want to hurt others.

You are too fat and it’s not good for your health. Stop complaining about the genetic. Start eating well and make some exercises (I can make this kind of statement, since I’m fat!).

OK, you understand my point. Whenever is it, you can take the control of your life starting for this boring meeting you don’t want to attend up to your conjugal life. It’s YOUR life, not the life of the others and let me tell you a secret, you only have one (OK, in my religion. It’s only one. Yours can differ). Don’t get me wrong, it’s not as easy as it seems. It’s not always black and white. Sometimes you need to make a difficult choice to change things, and sometimes you also need to lose one thing to get another one. It’s a long road until you get used to it, but it’s always a winning situation.

Trust me, I used to live like this since a couple of years. It’s not perfect and I’m not perfect for executing it, but I complain a lot less about “my life” than before. I’m also doing what I really want, meet the people I want, do the job I want… And you, are you trying to make your life better by taking the control of it or do you think I’m a complete idiot?

Creative Common Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/klimenko/5094829588/

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/*Comments*/

  1. Not that easy dude. Positive people think its all about free will. But it aint. You can’t wish for something and make true. Folks a wired differently than you. I know I’m not the positive guy and positive people seem suspicious to me. But then I’ve had a harsh life I wouldn’t wish on anyone and its left me angry, bitter and unhappy for the most part. I have to deal with it daily. Could be worse, but could a lot fucking better. 

    To me people who tell others to be positive is like telling someone who’s poor to get a job. Well statistically, if you are born poor you will die poor. Only a small minority escape poverty. There are to many factors to contend with to simply escape poverty. This means that people don’t really have control over their destinies, it only means some got luckier than others.  

    And if you want to debate causality, I’ll need to get my thoughts straightened out but I can prove to you through science that you hardly have a choice that you make that wasn’t already made before you even began considering it. Free will is a myth. 

    07/25/2011 04:08PM
    • fharper

      I didn’t mention it, but it was clear for me that I wasn’t talking about people in poor country or real health problem or situation like that. I was more talking about a “not real” problem: you have a job, but you don’t like it, by example.

      For the rest, like I said, it’s not always easy to make a change or make a big decision on your life, but it’s that easy to think like this and try to change it. What I really want to say here is that stop being negative and try to change your life if you don’t like it. Mostly everything can be changes.

      I don’t say either that if you want to be rich you’ll be able to do it just by wanting it, but you can try by working harder, by finding a job that pays much, but creating something you will sell, by… You may or may not succeed, but at least you’ll try.

      I hope it’s a lot clearer now. Oh and by the way, I was not born positive!

      07/25/2011 04:38PM
  2. For a total understaing of how completly out of control you are… read the book which I call “On the Origin of Species Part II: Genetics is a Fickle Btich”….

    The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins. 

    07/25/2011 04:16PM
    • Thanks for the suggestion. I added it to my wish list also known as “the list of the books I want to read, that grow a lot faster than the books I read”.

      07/26/2011 08:54PM
    • It could change how you see the world. It did for me.

      07/27/2011 09:43PM
  3. Both of your point of views are quite good. It’s true that we can almost change everything in our life if we really want and being positive is healthy and worth it. 
    I am totally going that way. It’s hard, it’s not as simple as it looks, it’s not “always” good, or positive ALL the time, but trying to live that way simply means you want a better life.

    Sure, there’s a lot of sh*t that can happen, but in our “occidental world”, I do think it’s possible to change things by being positive. Go get what’s good for you, and most of all: stop bothering everybody with your negative thoughts when they come ;)

    07/26/2011 11:33AM
    • It’s so true that being positive lead to a healthier life. Fewer worries mean less stress, and less stress means a lot of good things.

      07/26/2011 09:18PM
    • Positivism is a bad survival strategy. Studies show that negative people, suspicious people live longer. It’s pretty easy though. If early humans would have thought that the noise in the bushes was no big deal, humanity would have ended before it really started. The dream you have about falling, those are a survival mechanism from when we lived in trees to keep you alert and not fall out of the tree while sleeping.
       

      07/27/2011 09:47PM
    • I think that you need to make the different about prudence, suspicious and negativity. Maybe studies prove that negative people will live longer, but I can say without a doubt and any studies, that positive people will have a lot better. I prefer live ten years less now and have a beautiful life, or the one near the one I want. We only have one life to live!

      07/28/2011 10:02AM
  4. @Dave, I agree that the choices put in front of you in life have a lot to do with where you been dropped on Earth. BUT we always have choices. Choosing to do nothing about our life situations is still in fact a choice.

    I too am suspicious of people who always seem overly positive, but what is the alternative? Who wants to hang around with a debby-downer always looking to unearth the negative? No thanks..

    That said, I’m torn on your “free will is a myth” comment. You see..I too am fat, and my will is such that I wish I were not. But alas I continue too eat poorly and not exercise…but no matter how convincing I am when I tell myself it’s not my fault and to blame my being fat on being unlucky or having no control over my destiny, I’d be hard pressed to say that wasn’t bullshit.

    I’ll look into that book though as well. Perhaps Fred and I can split it?

    12/12/2013 04:22PM
    • Go ahead with the book Jeff as I won’t read it: I have too many books on my list.

      12/13/2013 01:11PM

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